My Granny is a Samurai

My granny is a samurai,
She gardens with a sword.
She dead heads her chrysanthemums,
then bows and says she’s bored.

My granny is a samurai,
She mows the lawn by stealth,
She calls the king the emperor
and sips green tea for health.

My granny is a samurai,
with living room tatami,
she rolls in off the battlefield
and snores like an army.

My granny is a samurai,
She loves to eat raw fish.
She is the chopstick ninja
as I chase mine off the dish.

My granny is a samurai,
although she’s her own boss.
She climbs the fence to pick me up,
which makes my teacher cross.